(photo borrowed from © http://www.seepuertorico.com/)
Mix all of this together and toss in a dash or two of relationship failure, you have varietal recipe for life-is-shit stew - which can be unhealthy and full of carbs. I couldn’t live this way any longer - I’ve been running ever since I realized how negatively unhappy I had become.
For me, the steps were simple, though not always easy. Kick out everyone in my life that is shady and/or negative - I stopped talking to them, deleted them from my phone and social networks.
You can block the negativity or simply change your number, be however drastic you need to be - it’s okay. This is YOUR life. Be in control of it for God’s sake! Next, write a list of everything that brings you down or affects your drive or happiness. Now, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!
Painfully, I realized that even my family relationships were judgmental and negative - so I tried to heal them and failed. I also felt that I was spinning my tires, living in my hometown area for my entire life - the same old thing, every day becoming more and more stale. It has been stifling my creativity and openness. These are all negative, mind-numbing issues that have been preventing me from growing and taking my passions further toward the goals I’ve set for them.
For the past year, I’ve worked as a bartender at a large club in Columbus. In less than a year, I was managing 15 other bartenders. The club focused on dance parties and was a concert venue with 4 bars and a restaurant. Needless to say, I had a lot of responsibility. The job was just fine, with the exception of my insanely negative, inappropriately unprofessional, sociopathic boss. I’ve never been involved in something that made you feel like an awful person daily - where management didn’t give a one percent f@&% about any of their employees. If someone else made a teeny tiny mistake, everyone was punished and verbally abused. Basically, the most negative place on earth, second only to Hitler’s inner circle (yes, yes - I know. I’m exaggerating... but barely).
In the end, I decided it was necessary for me to leave the place and the people that have me so very jaded - and to focus on a starting a brand new life.
After all this junk that brought me down and after all the work to fix my life, I’m freaking exhausted. After I leave everything I’ve ever known behind, I’m taking a little vacation away, far away. So, my feel good reward is that I’m sending my self on a trip to the Caribbean, a part of the world I’ve never experienced - but have always dreamt of visiting. The allure of white sand beaches and bright blue colored waters is enough for me to feel relief and happiness again - even if I was to stay in Columbus, although, that’s only a temporary cheer-me-up.
It’s ok to focus on your self from time to time - it’s ONLY up to YOU to make yourself happy. People, money and jobs come and go - there is a huge world of possibilities out there. Come to terms with your problems, discover your fix, do something about it and then give yourself a feel good reward.